If you are frightened of the dentist

Surveys of Canadian and international populations consistently put moderate dental anxiety in the range of a third of adults, with a smaller group whose fear is severe enough to keep them away entirely for years. Everyone in that waiting room looks calm. A good proportion of them are not.

The reason it is worth naming rather than enduring is that avoidance has a mechanism. You put off a visit, a small problem becomes a larger one, the eventual appointment is longer and more involved, and it confirms the fear. Breaking that loop early is easier than breaking it late.

This is not a courtesy. It changes the appointment operationally: how long is set aside, how much is explained while it happens, and whether the plan starts with something small rather than something significant.

You do not have to explain why, or justify it, or have a story. “I find this difficult” is a complete sentence.

Raising a hand is the usual one. It works because it gives you a way to interrupt that does not involve speaking with instruments in your mouth, and because knowing you can stop is most of what makes it bearable — most people who agree one never use it.

• A morning appointment, so you are not spending the day anticipating it.
• Bringing someone with you.
• Headphones, if the practice is happy with it — for many people the sound is the worst part.
• Asking for a look-and-talk visit first, with no treatment at all.
• Asking to be told before each step rather than after.

Where anxiety is disabling rather than uncomfortable, there are established routes: sedation options that a dentist can discuss and assess you for, and psychological approaches such as cognitive behavioural therapy, which has evidence behind it specifically for dental phobia. Both start with the same conversation. Ask.